My New Guilty Pleasure

I wish I’d thought of it. Could populate it a million times over with the wacky and unintentionally hilarious things my mother says. Fob is short for “fresh off the boat,” and of course chaos ensues through translation. My mother is from New Zealand, so I think that counts.

Go here for My Mom is a Fob.

(Thanks, Mia!)


All in a day’s work

Text message #1: Thisisyourmom.Iamtextingyou.
Text message #2: I.Dont.Know.How.To.Space.The.Letters.How?
Text message #3: Diditwork?
Text message #4: Howaboutnow?Isitworking?
Text message #5: Ididthat.
Text message #6: Ok.I.Am.Calling.Jed.He.Has.The.Same.Phone.
Text message #8: As you can see now I know how to do!
Text message #9: Listen to my new message! I wont answer. Call now.
New voicemail message: “Hi. This is your mom. Or your friend. If you do not fit into one of these categories, please do not call me. Thank you.”

Vanessa McGradyMy New Guilty Pleasure

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