Where the Light Is

There’s that old joke about the drunk looking for something under a lamppost. A cop comes over and asks what he’s doing.

“Looking for my keys,” the drunk says. “I dropped them across the street.”

“Well if you dropped them across the street, why are you looking for them here?”

“The light’s better.”

Which reminds me of something I tell people at work all the time. We may operate on one space, the easiest, the most convent, the safe one we know. The one where the light shines brightest.

But our audiences may be elsewhere.

So I sent stuff to Facebook and Linked In and Twitter, but how do I know pregnant people hang out there?

Then I found the mother lode, referred to me by a young mom I know: www.babycenter.com. Where there is a group for pregnant teenagers.

Hopefully, as I shine a light in this new space, I will find the key.

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Vanessa McGradyWhere the Light Is

Comments 8

  1. Anonymous

    Only spamming your adoption requests on Baby Center is against the community guidelines. If you were as good of a reporter as you say you are, you’d know this, because you’d have done the research.

    How dare you approach vulnerable teenagers and suggest the only option available to them is adoption? In case you haven’t notice the Pregnant Teenagers group on Baby Center is for SUPPORT. Support in HAVING our children. Not in giving them up.

    You really should have done your research.

    I wish you all the luck in the world finding a child to adopt. I actually wish I had one FOR you to adopt, as I know the struggles one faces in trying to conceive. But preying on teenagers is an absolute horrible thing to do.

  2. 40licious

    Anonymous, I wish you’d left a name and address where I could write to you personally.

    I had NO IDEA that posting on that site would be such a terrible gaffe. I thought I was being reassuring and supportive, but telling that young woman considering adoption shouldn’t feel pressured to do ANYTHING she didn’t want to, and that by showing up as a real person who is in the situation to adopt would be helpful.

    Clearly, this was not the case and I did want to post an apology to all the girls on that site, but I am now blocked. I hope you will pass this on. It was my first time on there. I will also pass this on as a learning experience other prospective parents looking for a match.

    I wish you all the best of luck.

  3. Anonymous

    Do you realize you sound like a recent baby hungry woman that sliced open the belly of another woman for her child? Instead of trolling the internet looking for someone to child-snatch, why dont you look for reputable adoption agencies and do it the legal way?

  4. 40licious

    I actually didn’t realize that and I truly apologize. I thought I was being helpful … and I am registered with a legal adoption agency and have just finished my homestudy. However, it appears that it will be up to $30,000 now to have a lawyer “market” me as a prospective adoptive parent. I thought I could try and do it myself.

    I’m so sorry I offended you.

  5. Anonymous

    I think your gaffe was that your post was directed at the teen moms. Even your posts here put out images of someone hoping to fish from a stocked pond.

    I am sorry you are struggling on your journey to parenthood. BabyCenter is a supportive and protective community full of women on varying journeys into parenthood, you unfortunately came at the community the wrong way.

    I’m sorry your desires got you banned. I wish you luck in your quest. –another mom

  6. Kassandra

    I’m sure if you go back under another screenname you’ll find plenty of support in the adoptive moms thread. Hints, tips and such when it comes to finding lawyers and all of that.

    Adoption agencies and lawyers work in their best interest. They could be telling you one thing to get them business when in fact it’s entirely another scenario. I’ve never heard of needing a lawyer to advertise your adoption profile.

    Much luck to you in your journey. By the way I’m the previous poster who responded so angrily to your post on Pregnant Teenagers. I will give you a personal e-mail if you still want that.

    I didn’t mean to come off sounding so…bitchy. I tend to have a sharp tongue. I’ve been on the Pregnant Teenagers site for 3 years so I know the impact adoption posts have on the girls there. I never stopped to think you would not know that. I sorry for that.

  7. 40licious

    Thanks, Kassandra. I have asked to come back on as myself, but if that doesn’t work, I am sure there are other adorable usernames I can come up with!

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