7

Hard

This post is not about all the things 40licious is. It is not inspiring or informative. It is just that I wanted to write about how hard it is to be in the waiting phase of an adoption. I keep wondering if we had better pictures that make us look more, I don’t know, suburban or Malibu, if that would …

Vanessa McGradyHard
8

40licious Body: Infertility Articles Omit Adoption Information

I’m glad we’re all paying attention to the plight of women in their 40s who grew up believing they can have it all, then suddenly realized it might be more difficult than they thought. This article in The Faster Times, for example, does a great job how the pill blessed and damned a generation of women. And this one, in …

Vanessa McGrady40licious Body: Infertility Articles Omit Adoption Information
5

Adoption Support Group

Our profile Each month, Steve and I try to make it to the adoption support group our agency runs for adoptive parents, children, birth moms, and people like us, people who are waiting. We took the long drive down to Orange County last night to connect with those I am beginning to consider “our people.” It was an unusually joyous …

Vanessa McGradyAdoption Support Group
1

But There’s a Catch …

When you get so deep into a process sometimes you lose sight of what it is you’re doing in the first place. Friday I was working from home, intent on finishing a film with a hard deadline. I was so engrossed in the finer points of iMovie 11 I hadn’t noticed that my social worker had called. Her message: “There’s …

Vanessa McGradyBut There’s a Catch …

A Year as Measure

Watching salmon is hypnotic. You should seriously try it sometime. Everything else becomes small and not as important. A year ago Stevie and I were on our way to Washington, dog in tow, making the long, cold journey home for Thanksgiving to see my family and scrape up oysters from Uncle Seamus’ beach. We hiked up Lilliwaup Creek with Amanda …

Vanessa McGradyA Year as Measure
3

Respecting the Process

This is what it is like to have a baby after 40licious, no matter which way you get it. Here’s a big difference between being 40licious and younger than that.* When you are 7 or 15 or 20 or 33 or even 38, you want what you want now. You want it to happen when you deem you are ready …

Vanessa McGradyRespecting the Process
1

Trajectory

Bathroom before: I don’t know what I was thinking five years ago when I chose this tile. Actually, I was thinking that if I couldn’t get it at Home Depot, my wild fantasy of white subway tiles didn’t exist. We are making joint decisions about things little and big. Like the decision to stay where we live now instead of …

Vanessa McGradyTrajectory